I actually am a pretty awesome go-getter. When I set my mind to something, I can usually make it happen and won’t stop until I get close to making it happen but, I’ve been noticing over the last year or two that whenever I’m making progress towards something, I get locked into comparing myself to other people’s success and it steals my confidence is a big way. I could be totally on the up and up with my own stuff and then I just STOP because I’m on social media, watching all these other amazing women doing amazing things and I just feel like I’ll never get there. A confidence killer. A hustle killer. But I gotta be online so...what’s the best way to stop comparing? Oh yes, the good ol’ comparison game. I like to categorize comparison as “confidence crusher.” It hangs out with perfectionism, self-doubt, judgment, imposter syndrome. These are all considered things that can crush your confidence. ...........Hence why I call them that........ Haha Anyway - People consider all the confidence crushers as “bad” things. There are many reasons we see them as bad: They make us feel bad. They make us stop working. They make us do crappy work. They steal our confidence and self-esteem. And while we’d all prefer not to have these experiences, I believe these experiences can be helpful to our growth. So when you say “what’s the best way to stop comparing?” I say - you don’t. You don’t want to learn how to stop comparing. Because comparison can have some pretty solid lessons for you. I want to try to keep this short so, I’m not going to go into how to positively use comparison in your life but I would like to help you see comparison in a different light - So, Instead, let’s think about it like this: how can you change the perspective on the way you are comparing and the effect it has on your life and your work? Comparison can be a good thing: It can help you see who else is doing what you’re doing in your industry, the techniques they’ve used to be successful, What people are watching or engaging online, when they are actually buying, so many different ways comparison can be helpful. Here is my biggest piece of advice I have when it comes to comparison (I teach many ways to handle social comparison but I think this one is my favorite AND will help you the most based on the work you are doing) - How can you frame this comparison as inspiration vs competition? One of my first business coaches used to say to me: If you see someone else doing something successfully, that shouldn’t discourage you. That should show you what’s possible. So if you’re grinding away and you see success...and then you flip on Instagram and see other people having success...how can you, in that moment, choose to focus on all the success being had vs how someone else may be having more success than you. Practicing comparison as inspiration allows you to look at two things and say “wow, it looks like she’s having a lot of success doing XYZ...I wonder if there is a way I can implement those things too...” Also try to remember that - sometimes what we see on social media isn’t at all the strategies or techniques that are *actually* having people see success. You may be over here dragging yourself around over something that...isn’t even really there. Social comparison, social media in general, has the ability to be a block in movement. A stall in momentum. Usually self-inflicted because we make up stories in our heads based on what we see people doing on social media. We tend to lean towards “let’s make this as negative as possible” but it only takes a few moments to stop that thought cycle and say “well, good for her. Now, lemme go back to focusing on my own work so I can get where I want to be.” While I believe there is a healthy place for comparison in our lives, I also want you to remember something: You know who isn’t out here comparing themselves to other women? SUCCESSFUL WOMEN! Why? They are too busy focusing on their work, their path, their success to worry about what the women next to them may be doing at this very moment. I encourage you to get back to your own work. Don’t let social media or what some other woman is doing keep you from seeing the success yoru go-getter spirit deserves. Instead, let it motivate you towards keeping the action in your own work consistent and aligned towards your goals. Remember, when you engage comparison, instead of getting stuck in the quicksand of negative comparison, find the inspiration in the comparison and keep your eyes on your own paper until you See More Paypah! Hahaa, okay, that’s just silly but you know what I mean!! Thank you for listening to this weeks episode of TCC. I appreciate all the messages I’ve gotten about where to send your questions so I’m gonna make it super easy for you to send those in. Just hit the link in the details of this episode to submit your question and then make sure to tune in each week to hear my advice! SUMBIT YOUR QUESTION HERE https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfZc91cC1MlHHPXP0_XLQmduXLXspYO5mt4sD9vWFHszdgBkg/viewform Have a great rest of yoru week and I’ll be back here with you next Wednesday.